Via I'm I'm in your water

Even if you're not a fan of the dance, or Lotteria, you gotta love the guy in the funky hat in the beginning of the video.

As of, err... a couple of weeks ago I guess, I am Editor of a new, soon-to-be-launched FREE UK Muslim magazine, called SAL.AM, which can be found at http://sal.am - funky URL, no?

I can't take any credit for the idea; that belongs to brothers Mehedi and Ali of iGraphic.

Besides, some of you may be thinking: "What? Yet another Muslim magazine?!".

Well, for one, I personally don't believe the UK market has reached saturation point when it comes to Muslim magazine publications. Especially not free ones!

I won't make any big promises that this will be the most awesomest (new word) magazine, eva! But darn it, I'll try my level best not to disappoint you guys, insha'Allah.

Oh, and you just know I am hitting you bloggers for some decent material - especially for the first issue which comes out far too soon to be feasibly imagined by a sane person (which is why they hired me!). So don't be shocked if you see my name in your inbox this week. Answer immediately, or I will not be pleased!

Feel the fear. Oh yeah... {winks}

Go and subscribe for your free copy RIGHT NOW!

- Jason

You must have seen the advert. He’s sat atop a pile of Ikea furniture (I think that collective noun should be ‘dump’) and reading the new catalogue. He starts in shadow and disappointingly the light fail to stay off opting instead to illuminate the dump of flat-pack tat and his own cretinous face. He starts to waffle on about how good this large pile of MFD and glue would look in your one bedroom flat thereby immediately getting my back up on two levels – 1) I don’t have a one-bedroom flat, I have a semi-detached house with three bedrooms; and 2) What is he trying to imply about people who have one-bedroom flats? Are they to be pitied as the parish poor or held as exemplars of some concept he knows but won’t tell anyone? What about the shoppers who make their way (1) to IKEA stores? Can they only buy things if they have a one-bedroom flat? Are people with a bedroom and a boxroom turned away whilst people like me are run off the property by burly loggers throwing inedible Swedish sweets at our cars? What would they do if the Queen turned up? Behead off live on the Ikea website and ask you to guess its weight?

So, with my teeth well and truly set on edge, I grip the settee arm and prepare for a full blown rage-fest to pour out of my mouth. He and the advert do not disappoint. The porky pixie hops down (avoiding tripping, rolling down the dump and writhing in loud agony at the bottom with three compound fractures, a burst lung and an impalement – it’s fucking Health and Safety gone mad I tell you) and with a smirk that could start a fight in a Methodist temperance meeting asks us to guess how much the mound of veneer and leatherette behind him costs.

Who cares? Who the fuck cares? Really? Do you? Does anyone you know? I think the idea is that someone could win it. Yes, get the right amount and some ‘lucky’ (2) sod can win the lot. Quite what someone with a one-bedroom flat would do with a container lorry load of second-hand mis-matched furniture and other assorted shite is never explained by the blond cock. I assume they’d have to pile it up like he did and sit on the top until they sold enough of it off on ebay to see their own carpet again.

So well done Ikea, you yet again fill our homes not only with your flat-packed meh-ness, but also with another shit advert in what is a shameful litany of shit adverts. You absolute clits.

Should you wish to see the grinning scrotum sat atop his throne of dubious wonders, you can find it on here somewhere.

==========

(1) Dawn of the Dead springs to mind.

(2) Lucky as in saved from being dragged into a car only to discover the 'rescuers' are a bunch of hungry cannibals. With hard-ons.

FITKA

www.fitka.blogspot.com

It's Agyness!

And she looks just stunning. Totally the hottest face currently.

Those legs are to die for.

Woot!

Pizza Hut is throwing 100 million at a relaunch in the attempt to capture the high streets conscious eaters. The change of name comes with 8 new pasta dishes across 700 restaurants. AMV BBDO, will head a multi-million pound marketing campaign highlighting the change to air 7th October.

Other opportunities for in game products promotion include: Banks, tyres, insurances, breakdown cover, recruitment agencies and telecoms etc.

For phase 1 associate advertising will have exclusivity in each of the relevant areas.

Contact oliverthames{at}gmail{dot}com for info.

Esta campaña para la marca Kiwi –un producto para darle brillo a los zapatos y que elaboró Grey Hong Kong titulándola Dream Girl-, no se me hace para nada mala, incluso se me hace muy divertida y memorable y si evitamos analizarla por mucho tiempo, podremos observar una limpia y clara serie de ejecuciones bien trabajadas en todos sus elementos, excepto en uno: personalmente, considero que un buen director de arte debe tener un conocimiento basto de retoque, planos, iluminación, perspectivas y demás cosas, y aparentemente todo en estas piezas encaja, sin embargo la tipografía elegida para el copy se me hace sinceramente horrible:

La calidad final y la perfección debe ser siempre la prioridad al presentar nuestros trabajos y, aunque primordialmente lo más importante es la idea en si, el buen director de arte (e incluso y cada vez con más frecuencia los redactores) debe ejercer el poder de decisión y elección que le da el conocimiento adquirido a través de los años.

Tal como le damos su lugar a la iluminación, a las proporciones, a los planos y demás elementos, la selección de la tipografía debe ser cuidada como uno de los principales detalles, porque éso es lo que es.

Recientemente han empezado a poner estos carteles en las paradas de por aquí, y es que no tiene desperdicio.

Desde el original diseño de el salón de los Simpsons, hasta la prueba de la marca 3M y sus cristales blindados, todo vale. Para prueba la galería:

Vía Toxel.

Courtney Cox counts her friends, and while waiting for viewers to register, Sarah Silverman takes off her bra (03:34).  There's more Silverman voting comedy here.

You know you've gotta vote, right? 

I guess the closest Kiwi equivalent is the advert on telly at the mo where some silly, lanky boy takes the mickey out of Amber Peebles.  Only, that ad is so annoying.  Or this version, with the lovely Jane Yee saying pretty much what some of the American stars say.  Except, it sounds like she's recording from the inside of a baked bean tin.

Kiwis can enrol here to vote in the NZ election, only 35 days from now.

How does one sum up the contemporary female as viewed by the gutter press?

Well look no further folks, it’s here.

Being perpetually presented with media stereotypes of women, the new Heat advert is the perfect representation of all that is wrong with how we view the role of the young woman in today’s society. What is more disturbing is how this celeb crap is something women aspire too.

My favourite whipping boy (and she’s got a face like a bloke) is Jordan, the tit-waggling tart who, by a combination of self exploitation and sheer greed, has managed to make a fucking fortune by using the media to reinvent herself at the expense of her own family. As a role-model, the damage has already been done. Every other aspiring ‘celeb’ is only too happy to be seen, cosmetically adjusted for the purpose of the universal proletariat bloke, swaggering about wearing nothing but tooth floss in order to gain the attentions of the paparazzi.

But there is more. After the mutual exploitation has established a ‘celeb’, said celeb will often bite the hand that fed it. This results in violence - think Allen/Winehouse who regularly find themselves having to punch their way out of their own homes or clubs when the monster they’ve created turns to suck the very marrow out of their bones.

It has to be said that the violence is usually dished out by those that, to some degree, have earned their fame via talent (the likes of Jordan and Marsh couldn’t afford to spurn the attentions of the press) but obviously such behaviour keeps the artist in the public eye, which will ultimately result in record sales. young women are left with the notion that it’s acceptable for women to use their fists as well as their tits.

Now the Heat advert. Incidentally, Heat is nothing more than a paparazzi-landfill with a desire to do no more than poke its nose into the lives of those that jangle their enhanced privates / damaged emotions at cameras before dishing out gushing praise or more commonly, screaming vitriol, to nosy gossips and fishwives.

So, after being presented with a typical cover of Heat, an expose on some gits Lumpy Thighs’ for fucks sake, two women start to punch the crap out of one another.

We’re presented with the idea that Heat is of such value that two perfectly normal women are prepared to kick seven bells out of each other in order to read the last available copy. But even within the advert there is more bird-baiting, while these two fairly ordinary wankers roll about on the floor a model serenely plucks the magazine from the shelf looking down at the ‘ordinary’ pugilists with a certain degree of disgust.

Sort of says it all about the magazine, it’s content and it’s readers.

Actually, I could go on and on about this... but I won’t.

i am back to my own self... no more bein' one retarded bein'... but the scars are still there... i'll leave it there so i know the pain i might be sufferin' again...

dan insya Allah... i will try to blog as freely as i can this time... kepada yang menyokong diri ini... terima kasih...

aku ini hanyalah bagai camar yang pulang... merindui kedamaian dulu...

and salam aidilfitri... maaf zahir dan batin...

But that isn't why he likes Country Life butter.

He spreads a bit of Country Life on his toast in the mornings simply because it tastes great.

We will all get to know this tonight when the new Country Life TV advert airs for the first time - at least, you will know it if you choose to tune into ITV's Pride of Britain awards show. If you don't want to do that, The Guardian have an exclusive preview of the new ad.

There are those who will bemoan the fact that the Sex Pistols' frontman and punk icon has sold out by lowering himself to appear in such an ad.

They shouldn't, these things happen.

It is why Phil Daniels not only appeared on the 'Enders, but was also a contestant on the new series of Strictly Come Dancing. The fact the archetypal anti-hero was ignominiously booted off the first show was somehow fitting - besides, I still haven't forgiven him for that Blur song.

There are those who maintain you should never meet your heroes as you'll always been disappointed.

I don't agree. I've been fortunate enough to meet a few and they've all been positive encounters.

They didn't meet some expectations, but they never do because our perceptions of them are hardly ever based on fact or reality.

So John Lydon is advertising butter. So what?

It won't make me start buying Country Life and it won't make me avoid it should I be in the market for something to spread on my bread rolls.

And anyway, if the bread is good enough quality then you don't need to spread anything on it.

Welcome to SurfaceXCreation or SxC. For those of you who didn't come here from SL05NED, I am the same guy. SL05NED is basically the same thing as this page except for the name. So feel free to browse around and check out my new site!

First of all, apologies for the lateness of this post. I have been preparing and recording a very special edition of the WiiDS podcast, to be released this week.

Wario Land: Shake Dimension is one of my current favourite games, if not one of the greatest platformers of all time. With it's flinging, throwing, shaking and brute strength, Wario powers through the world rather than taking times to gracefully jump from platform to platform like most characters.

Nintendo has made this VERY special trailer to promote the game which uses a lot of clever tricks to express it's awsomeness. Unfortunately the trailer will not last forever and cannot be embedded in the post, so click here to see the full awsomeness!

Se trata de una acción muy interesante realizara para Slim Fast en parques y sitios de tráfico humano, cosa que le da todavía más valor ya que sería difícil encontrar una mejor ubicación para posicionar la ya clásica bebida Slim Fast, que en sitios donde la gente acostumbra a tener actividad física con motivos mayormente estéticos:

Nuevamente y para subirse al barco de presupuestos bajos, una acción que no demerita en lo más mínimo y que sólo necesita una fracción del presupuesto de los clientes para generar awareness.

Secuestrado de: Scaryideas